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Clouds on the sunshine

As Miss C. said in the comments to my last post, everyone needs a pass on sunshine and happiness once in a while.  In general, the Omega household is just puttering along, but there are some clouds on the sunshine.

First off, that really way-kewl opportunity for OmegaDad vanished into the mists.  Sigh.  What happened: at his mid-August conference, he was actively courted by a high-level person in his agency for a specific position.  This HLP actually re-tooled the position announcement so that he could apply for it.

Then two weeks later, the HLP got bumped upwards in the chain of command (moving and shaking going on).  *Poof* went the job.  Within a week, it was re-re-announced, with qualifications that automatically disqualified OmegaDad.

Then there's the dotter.  Another sigh.

After our trek to Colorado, I was going to review the second adult workshop I attended, about emotion regulation.  I obviously haven't gotten around to that.

Anyway, it appears that we are having some real problems on that front.

The dotter has been having severe tantrums.  The kind of tantrums where she gets wound up to the point where she is throwing things, hitting things, screaming, and ends up...sobbing, "Help me!  Help me stop!"

So, one night, while she was trying to calm down in my lap, and I was trying to get her to breathe in deeply, then breathe out, I asked her, "Would it help if we found someone other than Mommy and Daddy to help you learn how to calm down?"  She nodded yes.  As a result, I'm looking for...someone.  A child psychologist?  A counselor?  An occupational therapist?  Goodness only knows.  Time for me to call Dr. Sheila, our pediatrician.

In the meantime, we're going to shortstop some of what's causing the tantrums: late nights to bed, trying to get her back into her bed after she wakes up in the middle of the night, etc.  We've invested in...

...another sticker chart!!!

She gets a gold star if she stays in her own bed all night long.  She gets a silver star if she stays in her bed for a significant part of the night, and sleeps the remainder of the night on her "special bed" (folded quilt with sleeping bag on top).  She gets no star if she crawls into bed with us or throws a tantrum in the middle of the night.  After seven gold stars or 14 silver stars, she gets this.  We'll see how bribery goes.

It sure would be nice for all the Omegas to get a full night's sleep...or several full nights' sleep in a row!

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posted by Kate @ 9/28/2006 07:09:00 PM  
  • At 9/28/2006 07:18:00 PM, Blogger Johnny said…

    I figured that the ultimate prize would involve a long horse ride or something involving ponies?

  • At 9/28/2006 07:33:00 PM, Blogger Kate said…

    I was astonished, Johnny. Nope. Y'see, there are suddenly all these toy catalogs pouring into our mailbox. And the dotter has suddenly realized that they are full of pictures of toys. And she saw Slinky Dog.

    I'm a happy camper. This leaves us lots of stuff for Christmas and bday presents.

  • At 9/28/2006 08:42:00 PM, Blogger Miss Cellania said…

    Oy, I wish gold stars would work to keep my nine-year-old out of my bed. She takes up a lot of room. She's probably do it for an iPod.

    What you need is Supernanny. But have you considered Grandma?

  • At 9/28/2006 09:15:00 PM, Blogger Granny J said…

    Grany, the beeg disciplinarian? Eeeek! Or did you mean me as the prize? That's not so bad.

  • At 9/28/2006 10:43:00 PM, Blogger PAgent said…

    I used to think it was a complete failure of parenting to offer children bribes for good behavior.

    That's because I was an idiot.

    Bribes work. Woohoo! I say, let the bribes roll in!

  • At 9/29/2006 06:29:00 AM, Anonymous figlet said…

    Oh sigh. Tantrums are wearing on everyone. We have a tantrum girl. I was a tantrum girl. But no one ever offered me stars and a slinky. So..... Good luck!!

  • At 9/29/2006 07:42:00 AM, Blogger Space Mom said…

    The calming is the HARDEST thing in the world. We once had a tantrum that ended in vomit. I have since instituted the "Yoga breathing" when we get too upset...

    Good luck helping Dotter find her calming ways. It is hard.

    Bribes work.. I consider them "unnatural consequences for good behavior" yeah. that's the ticket!:)

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About Me
Name: OmegaMom
Home: Southwest
About Me: Middle-aged mom of a 4-year-old adopted from China. Love science, debate, good SF and fantasy, hiking, music of almost every style. Lousy housekeeper. "Good enough" mom.
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