Monday, June 26, 2006
In which our heroine writhes with envy
"Envy shoots at others and wounds itself" - Old English proverb.
So this week is the first round of adoption referrals from China since the Omegas got the Bad Word. People are posting referrals on blogs, on Rumor Queen, and elsewhere.
Those of you who have gone through the infertility wringer know how I'm feeling--it's just like that feeling you would get when Yet Another Person announced a pregnancy. It's a whole new facet of the "It's not FAIR!!" world.
Oh, don't get me wrong--I'm happy, thrilled for those who have received their referrals. But whereas, pre-OmegaDotter, referrals were exciting harbingers of things to come for us, and post-OmegaDotter, referrals were a misty-eyed, sentimental reminder of what it was like (plus a harbinger of things to come)...now...now it's provoking a lot of miserable and whiny "why me?" emotions.
I feel like a sour old maid with pursed up lemon-lips.
Wah, wah, wah.
posted by Kate @
6/26/2006 03:12:00 PM
4 Comments:
4 Comments:
-
At 6/26/2006 07:02:00 PM,
said… -
At 6/27/2006 04:54:00 AM,
Miss Cellania said… -
At 6/27/2006 09:30:00 AM,
said… -
At 6/29/2006 07:09:00 AM,
Kate said…Theresa--We were looking at a particular waiting child, which is why we got the news. Best of luck! (Guangxi girls are awfully cute!)
Miss C.--I am more weepy than sour. That was a kind of bad day.
Chicagomama--Chocolate always helps. Dark chocolate is preferred. Send lots of it FedEx, the week is horrid.
I know it is not the same as what you are going through but for the past year I have been checking a particular agency's WC list and have fallen for a few of the children-but at this time I cannot convince dh to go for #2. I feel like he has slammed the door on the idea of a sibling for dd and it hurts every time I read another family announcing they are adopting one of the waiting children I have fallen for even though I am happy for the children that they will now have families.
Two years ago I had a shocking second pg and second misc. But it has only been the past 6 months I have really felt that someone is missing in our family-#2.
I refuse to give up hope completely.
Don't you give up hope OmegaMom. #2is out there for you. Try to believe it.
ps I was on your blog earlier today with dd on my lap and when she saw OmegaDottir-she said "She looks like me!" And she really does-a fellow Guangxi girl and 4years old as well!