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PWNED!

At ten to noon, I get a phone call at the office from OmegaDad.  OmegaDotter's teacher had called him, saying OD didn't feel well and was running a low fever.

The dotter was sick yesterday, in that horrid, cranky, whiny way that kids who are somewhat sick are, as compared to the deep, quiet misery of kids who are really sick.  We stayed home yesterday.  This morning, though, no fever, no cranky whinies, pretty much normal kiddo, so I took her in.

So I pack it in and head off to preschool--no big surprise that her fever is back.

When I arrive there's the dotter sitting at the table, bouncing and smiling.  My mommy radar goes off.  Miss M., her teacher, says in a dubious voice, "Well, she was sick yesterday, and she hasn't been feeling good, and she does have a low fever..."

How low is low?  99-something.  Hmmm. 

On the way home, she's smiling and singing and dancing and giggling and happy.

Let me tell you, this child is not sick.

Half of me is laughing, the other half is going, "Grrrr."  I have made it quite clear that this is not to happen again (you can tell she knows I know she isn't sick).  I lectured her about what Mean Mommies do in this situation, about how next time this happens, she will be put to bed pronto, since she's so sick.  I made her take ibuprofen (ewww!).

OmegaDad, like me, was halfway laughing, halfway not, when I called him to tell him we had all been played.  "That little shit!" were his exact words.

That little shit, indeed.


Lest anyone take the "little shit" to heart and decide I'm a Bad Mother, I would like to include a disclaimer:  OmegaDotter is our joy and our heart, and "little shit" is meant in affectionately joshing tones.  And, if anyone wonders why on earth I'm bothering to include this little disclaimer, just head on over to AmFam to get an idea of the humorless and self-righteous folk who populate the world.  (Further disclaimer:  AmFam is not humorless and self-righteous.)

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posted by Kate @ 3/23/2007 02:01:00 PM  
6 Comments:
  • At 3/23/2007 02:27:00 PM, Blogger Dirk said…

    Oh the joy of a smart child...

    When I was a kid, the rules were simple. If you are too sick to be in school, then you are so sick that you are in bed, can't watch TV and have only bland food...

     
  • At 3/23/2007 02:50:00 PM, Anonymous SBird said…

    It sounds like she's figured out early on what a 'mental health' day is...!

     
  • At 3/23/2007 02:55:00 PM, Blogger Julie Pippert said…

    Hey have you seen the Real Moms meme? I can't recall just now if you've discussed it. I think my brain melted.

    Anyway.

    Real moms call their kids "little shit" with real love, real humor and real emotion.

    What a character.

    When mine pulled that stunt in the a.m. before school one day...it was basically as Dirk described. Hasn't come back up.

    But, as unrelated as possible to that event, I did schedule some one-on-one time and stuff she likes to do, which, I suspect, is really what she was pining for.

     
  • At 3/23/2007 04:07:00 PM, Anonymous atomic mama said…

    "Little shit" and "pissant" are very endearing terms in my family!

    Sucks that you need a disclaimer. Big time.

     
  • At 3/23/2007 10:16:00 PM, Anonymous lizard said…

    little shit indeed.

    I pawned my kid off on a friend today, so I didn't clobber her. Well, really, I begged for a play date and the friend offered to just take the kid. The result was the same: the little shit survived until bed time.

    We had an event this week where "someone" woke at 6:15 and claimed to be hungry, thus not getting put back to bed. Went downstairs, asked what she wanted to eat, and was told "I'm not hungry." Then of course she asked for TV.

    Arrgh. And I don't mean that in a pirate way.

    I would definitely have insisted on the ibuprofen, if not something more yucky tasting. And the afternoon in bed. No TV. No movies. And just soup (not a favorite for my kid).

    Sigh.

     
  • At 3/24/2007 12:16:00 PM, Blogger Kate said…

    Dirk--Yup, that will be the future. This is the first time, though, that I've been absolutely positive that it was mostly a ploy to get to go home!

    SBird--Har! I know that feeling well!

    Julie--I was thinking of that, and also came across one of my GoodBlogs links titled "Some days I just don't like my children". When I clicked through, the lady who wrote it said she was afraid to admit it. And I thought, "Really?! Afraid?! Don't all moms feel that way at one point or another??"

    Anyway, I suspect the one-on-one time is a good idea.

    AM--Yeah, it sucks big time to feel one needs to spell it out, in case someone takes it seriously. I can tell you that if and when OmegaDad and I go for dotter secunda (when we get our shit together, if that ever happens), I'll keep it a deep, dark secret until it's over with.

    Lizard--Hah! "Someone" wakes up indecently early in this house, too. And we get the "I'm hungry" and then the "Ewww. I'm *not* hungry!" when the food is presented. If it weren't for a deep-seated desire not to make food a praise/punishment thing, at those times I'd just give her the hairy eyeball and say "EAT IT." and not let her leave the table until she was done. Ahem.

     
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About Me
Name: OmegaMom
Home: Southwest
About Me: Middle-aged mom of a 4-year-old adopted from China. Love science, debate, good SF and fantasy, hiking, music of almost every style. Lousy housekeeper. "Good enough" mom.
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