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The pain of a Peter Piper Pizza party

OmegaDotter, now almost five, has reached the age of birthday parties.  We have been to three now.  The first two were relaxed, laid-back affairs at people's houses.  Hot dogs and burgers, cake and ice cream, a few games, present opening, voila, easy-peasy and relaxing.

Yesterday''s was at the poor man's Chuck E. Cheeze, Peter Piper Pizza.  We're too small to have a CEC here, so PPP has to do.  Having heard mutterings of CEC parties, I knew kind of what to expect when I walked in the door.


Noise!  Kids running everywhere!  Greasy pizza!  Noise!  Kids!  Cake!

Did I mention "noise"?

And pink!  Very, very pink!  The first two parties were boys' parties.  Little boys get to have primary colors at their birthday parties.  Little girls get to have pink!

Little girls' presents are also pink!

OmegaDotter and I had trudged off to Target to get a present.  Presents for the boys were easy.  Presents for a girl?  Um.

First off, the dotter kept pointing to things that I knew she wanted.  Horses:  horsie-looking horses.  Pink horses.  Horses with wings and long flowing hair.  Barbies and Disney princesses with horses.  Horses and carriages.  Setting aside the fact that I knew she was pointing them out because that's what she wanted, she also tended to pick the most expensive things.

And Bratz.

And Polly Pocketses.

Bratz--well, some moms don't want their girls to have Bratz.  (I'm not going to go into the deep moral, social, and literacy implications of Bratz.  Suffice it to say, they are the Epitome Of What Is Wrong With Our Society for some.)  So, nix on the Bratz.

Polly Pocketses--OMG.  Polly Pocketses are the work of Satan.  They have so many itty bitty accessories.  Each and every Polly Pocket comes with fifty kazillion small plastic items:  combs, brushes, hair dryers that are half-an-inch long, shoes, bracelets, notebooks, dogs, cats, dog dishes, leashes, you name it, Polly Pockets comes with it.  I eyeballed them, thought of household pets scarfing down small plastic objects and requiring emergency trips to the vet, or, at the very least, an unending search for The One accessory that is missing and causing great wailing and gnashing of teeth, but sure to turn up in the vacuum cleaner bag, and nixed Polly Pockets, as well.

We ended up getting some sort of (pink!) faux hairstyling set.  (I wanted to get the Barbie tea set.)  At least there were no small unnecessary plastic objects to get lost, eaten by small siblings, or stepped upon in the middle of the night.  Plenty of big unnecessary plastic objects, but they'd be the kind that would be easy to spot in the middle of the living room carpet.

Then we ventured off to the pizza place.  OmegaDotter's One and Only True Love, C., was there.  His mom was there, too, and we huddled with one other mom we know in a protective knot at the end of one of the tables, cringed at the noise, and guided one another through the intricate maze of tokens for games, redeeming winning tickets for toys, and shepherding children to and fro.

The headache and jangling nerves that resulted took hours to wear off.

OmegaDotter's birthday party will not be at Peter Piper Pizza.

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posted by Kate @ 11/06/2006 06:57:00 AM  
  • At 11/06/2006 07:16:00 AM, Anonymous Divasmama said…

    OMG, definitely one of the Rings 'O Hell. Diva will be 8 soon, and we so far have avoided such RsOH. And what is with all the flippin' PINK?! The homestead is Bratz and Barbie free (don't even get me started), but not for lack of constant trying on the Diva's part.
    God Help us, One and All

  • At 11/06/2006 11:42:00 AM, Blogger Johnny said…

    I hope you had a stiff drink at the end of the day, pardner.

  • At 11/06/2006 02:14:00 PM, Blogger Jennifer said…

    Man am I glad there are no Chuck E Cheeses nearby. There is a place called Tube Time but we don't venture there. I can only imagine. Blech!

  • At 11/06/2006 07:50:00 PM, Blogger Vinegar Martini said…

    So tell me that at least your place served beer.

    Chuckee Cheese is the work of the devil but they are marketing geniuses - they provide beer for the parents destined to sit there and deal with the noise, greasy pizza, and overly pink presents!

    Personally I think places like this should offer jello shooters, free margaritas and any other mind numbing adult beverage avialable for parents at those parties!

  • At 11/08/2006 05:36:00 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I couldn's stand Chucky Cheese, now we have Incredible Pizza! Who had the bright idea of putting go-carts inside with all those games and kids?

    Kids Furniture Crazy

  • At 3/23/2007 07:55:00 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Hey, you have a great blog here ! ¡ I´m definitely going to bookmark you !

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About Me
Name: OmegaMom
Home: Southwest
About Me: Middle-aged mom of a 4-year-old adopted from China. Love science, debate, good SF and fantasy, hiking, music of almost every style. Lousy housekeeper. "Good enough" mom.
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