A rant. So the inevitable "China Doll" discussion has reared its ugly head on APC again. As usual, those who have been around a long time mention the fact that "China Doll" is seen by many Asian-Americans, particularly Asian-American females, as being derogatory and stereotypical, and usually used in conjunction with ooky sexual connotations. As usual, there are those who see absolutely nothing wrong with the term "China Doll", have no truck with others finding it demeaning, and say, "As long as it's said with loooooove, I don't see how anyone can object!" OmegaMom goes cross-eyed when she reads these posts. In fact, there are a few particular posts that make OmegaMom want to reach through the computer screen, pull the posters out through it, give them a good solid one-two shake, then get them in a headlock and give them a GREAT BIG NOOGIE! (When informed of this irrational feeling on OmegaMom's part, Mr. OmegaMom snickered and commented, "Oh, yeah, that's a great way to solve the world's problems!" Harrumph. He just doesn't recognize truly World Saving Ideas when they snuggle up beside him in bed at night, that's all.) In separate off-line email exchanges with a number of Asian-American females who have adopted from China, sparked by the recurrent "China Doll" discussion, these separate women have told me that (a) they are tired of hitting their head against the wall of people ignoring, downplaying or pooh-poohing their personal experiences and that of their friends, and (b) a lot of the Asian-Americans who have adopted from China who started out on the bigger lists feel marginalized and isolated from and by the larger Caucasian adoptive community. OmegaMom doesn't get it. There you are, people with FIRST-HAND EXPERIENCE are telling you they have PERSONALLY been subjected to boorish street commentary a la "Ooooh, sexy little China Doll, come give me a f*ck!", and you're saying to them, "Well, it's different when you say it playfully and with love!" Hey, reality check here! You're getting commentary from Asian-American females. Guess what your daughter is?!?! She's a...drum-roll, please!...Asian-American female! There are loads of perfectly fine pet names for little girls. How about: Punkin', dumpling, sweetpea, bao-bao, half-pint, baby-doll, pookie, sugar, honey-chile, xiao wa-wa...pick a term, any term. Just maybe think a little harder about using a term that Asian-American females have clearly said makes them feel objectified and turned into a submissive sex-object. Noogies. That's what's needed. Lots and lots of noogies. Picture OmegaMom storming off, wildly waving her fists around her head.

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P.S. OmegaMom is NOT saying that no-one can use the phrase. Go right ahead. Just be prepared for your child to possibly be one of the folks who says something like this when she's grown-up: "She said it would be cute to have all these China-doll grandchildren," Chau said. "So, thank goodness for my grandmother's racism, because otherwise I wouldn't be here."...just substitute "my mother" for "my grandmother" and "children" for "grandchildren".